you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
