ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Everyone says I win the strip club
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
