do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
