Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize