another moral hangover. fuck.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I just googled if crying burns calories
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
