White coat. Heels.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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