i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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