Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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