Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Girls should come with a carfax report
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
