I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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