Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize