She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Randomize
