rhymes with "ouble enetration"
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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