I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
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