Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
