So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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