the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Randomize
