plz talk dirty to me
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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