we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
