so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
