On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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