Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize