Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
