I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Randomize