i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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