i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
