too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
