So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
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