Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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