i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
