While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
