...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Holy shit dude........stairs
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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