Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
This is my gift to your gina
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
i think i just lost a toe
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
