Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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