i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
