You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Randomize
