i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
