I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I need help removing her.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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