David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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