Come see our sink grown plant.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
