I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
