we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
