he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
