Pants 0. Shit 1.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
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