I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
