So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
