Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
