your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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