they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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