What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
