I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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