i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
